Nurse Nose

Elissa leaned to give hungry Killer a kissy, but he had different plans.

We've Encountered the #4 Al Qaeda Operative

His name is Mohammed Al Graham, a.k.a. "The Killer Graham".

He was discovered in a spider hole in the wasteland on the border of Afghanistan and Pakistan, sucking on the side of one of his hands. Fear not, he's in custody and responding well to breast-milk-boarding. He's already divulged the formula for Similac and told us the precise location of Osama bin Laden.

He's 1/4 years old!

Killer Graham Roche has hit the 3 month mark like a giant gorilla hits a bunch of bananas. He's right on track with most of the head/hands/eyes/ears milestones, but he's destroying the sizing convention for kids' clothes. We just got back for shopping for 6-9 month clothes, because he's stretching the 3-6 month pajamas. Meanwhile, he's not really a fattie like you'd expect. He's just very efficient at applying his food to make his bones longer (or something).

This month Graham totally discovered his hands. He's grabbing at everything, working on his precision. He's also taken to the 'Slinky' jingle (what walks downstairs, alone or in pairs) and the song from the old 'Perfection' game (push the plunger down, set the timer, fit the pieces in place, don't be slow). If you had to rank him among the other babies we know, he qualifies as a giggler.

That said, enjoy this month's pictures!!!! Link!!!

Fit Like a Fiddle

Graham had his long-awaited 2 month appointment today, and he's, in the doctor's overused terms, 'solid'.

Significant to the last post claiming his bigness, since October 15 he grew 2.5 inches, gained 4.25 lbs, and added 4cm to his head circumference. Where he was in the 65 to 75 percentile in height & weight last time, he's now a 'solid' 90th percentile.

Here's what Graham doesn't like: shots. He arrived at the office asleep, and started crying when we got him naked. Right when the doctor walked in, he was a flirty angel. All nice and everything. He stayed that way after he left, and gave the nurse with the needles a little goo goo. Then she stuck three needles into his thighs and he went into tomato mode. He turned red from the top of his head to the base of his tummy like a thermometer on a hot day. The crying didn't really stop until about 25 minutes ago, so we're talking about almost 6 hours of cranky.

He's fine now. We're cooking dinner while he's on the table in his car seat with the hiccups. For all intents and purposes, outside of the screaming we'll hear when we tear off his band-aids, he's unphased.

By the way, the doctor in the photo is not me, it's the real doctor. We have a couple friends who take their kids there too, and all of us get the same 'solid' keyword to describe our healthy children. Solid.

Graham is Big

The boy is big. Month #2 spanned from Halloween to Thanksgiving, and he trooped through the month slowly learning how and when to sleep, and, more importantly, how to smile.

Graham's favorite song is one that I made up over the course of a couple smile fits. It goes like this, and you make him rub his hands together like a mad scientist for the 'yes yes' parts.:

Sittin' on a rocket (poke him in the booty)
With money in your pocket (stick your finger in his fake-pocket)
Singin' yes yes yes yes yes yes yes (wringing his aforementioned hands)

Ticklin' your tummy (tickle his tummy)
And taking back my money (stick your finger in aforementioned fake-pocket)
Thinkin' yes yes yes yes yes yes yes (wring hands again)

[Repeat]

Here's the link to the pictures from the month. There are a lot of repeats, but they're all cute like buttons.

"Graham Grunts"

Boy Roche's latest nickname is "Graham Grunts". He grunts when he's happy, he grunts when he's sad, he grunts while he's eating and when he craps his pants. There's an increasing ratio of other sounds to his grunt count, but the grunts are winning by a mile. On that note, here are links to his week 3 and 4 slideshows. From here forward, I'm classifying his progress by months. Click on the links to see the respective weeks (1 thru 4):
	Week 1
	Week 2
	Week 3
	Week 4

Graham's First Two Weeks on Earth

We have all the photos of Killer Graham up on flickr, so you can look at his huge biceps in a slideshow. Enjoy!

Week 1

Week 2

Killer Graham vs. Big Shirley

In the orange corner, standing one foot 9 inches and weighing in at 8 and 3/4 pounds... Hailing from the mean streets of Seattle, Washington... Killer Graham Roche!

And the champion, at 2 feet 5 inches and weighing a solid 45 pounds... Pulled out of a steaming car in downtown Everett, Washington... Big Ass Shirley!!!

Shake paws and come out fighting...

Success! Graham Lucas Lives!

Thursday came and went without a hitch. The c-section surgery was without complication, and resulted in a healthy Elissa and a beautiful and sturdy Graham. He's a delight, for real.

The movies below were taken immediately after he came out. There's an initial video where he's covered in blood and jizz, thank me later for sparing you the convulsions.

Since we've had him, he's been 50% delight and 50% devil. The first night, he slept no longer than 30 minutes or so, none of which was outside of Elissa or my hands. 2nd night, angel. Third night, angel. Last night, things were so bad I felt I had to try every trick in the book to avoid criminal neglect charges. He wouldn't eat, cried for almost 7 hours non-stop, and we eventually had to feed him some formula just to keep his fluids up. After his first suckle, though, he's back on the good foot. I'm confident there's nothing he can do that will perplex us similarly, until he starts stealing bikes.

Please pardon the audio on the movies. When he was handed to me, I said something akin to "Welcome to Earth, Killer" and cried like a sissy not knowing what to say until we got back to the hospital room. Also, the 2nd video ends with the nurse saying "OK. This is the most dangerous...", and I can't for the life of me recall what was so dangerous. Maybe she knew he has the kung fu kick to end all kung fu kicks, and was about to say "OK. This is the most dangerous set of feet the human race has ever seen." Time will definitely tell.

Today is the Big Day!

After the longest year of our lives, today is the big day for Elissa and me. We're due at the hospital in an hour, and at 11:30ish, we should have the baby in our hands. Thanks to everyone for presents, prayers, and patience. Elissa's really happy to be transitioning from pregnant lady to Mom, and I'm happy for her (and for myself of course).

We'll be in the hospital from now until Sunday or Monday, and I'll be updating everyone as news comes through. Fingers crossed!

Killer Graham Lives!

Elissa had her bi-weekly doctor appointment today and we got an ultrasound of the baby's progress because he's measuring big. To be brief, today's findings have the baby's head circumference in the 95th percentile, and he's already estimated at 7.25 lbs with 5 weeks left before the due date.

That said, all the advice is for a scheduled c-section, which we've scheduled for 9/27 at 11AM. There's a chance that the labor will start early, but I'm jazzed about the date. 9 == 3*3, and 27 == 3*3*3. That's bad-ass, I don't care what you think. Plus, 9/27 is the first date in the new VH tour, so put that in your pipe and cry for me.

Regardless, the ultrasound was sadly mostly 2D. The two 3D pictures we got were of Graham's face (he looks like Melissa) and his undercarriage (he looks like me). No cause for alarm on anything else. I got to ask all the questions I had about c-sections, since our hippie birth classes deal mainly with the downside of modern medicine's contribution to birthing. Our doc did a good job of conveying to me that everything about giving birth is torture.

It seems that the process of picking how you have a baby is similar to how you decide how to remove a fish hook from your hand. There's a specific physical limitation that constrains your options to only those involving a lot of pain. Nothing is a cakewalk when it comes to getting that kid out, but we're taking one of the easier routes. Given the size of the cranium, the "ring of fire" we learned about in the hippie class would burn down the whole hospital for Elissa.

The countdown is on, the drum roll has started. 4 weeks from today, you know this.

Born Lucky, indeed

Be careful what you wish for. You might get it all at the same time.

Such is the case with me. I've been waiting for the wonderful Van Halen to reunite since the day my brother Dan and I figured out that Sammy Hagar wouldn't hold a candle to his predecessor. I've also been waiting for my whole adult life to spawn a descendant, and the aforementioned Graham Lucas Roche is the answer to those prayers. As (bad) luck would have it, these two blessed events are happening almost simultaneously. I'm not dismayed as much as I am in awe that the possibility for such overlap is uncanny in the grand scheme of the universe.

Had I not been expecting the coming of the chosen one, my master plan would make me the envy of my pathetic peers. There are a fistful of dates on the VH tour that will inevitably serve as the highlight shows. Their first show in Charlotte, NC, of course. NYC, LA, Chicago, definitely. Indianapolis, since DLR hails from Bloomington, likely. That said, a friend and I were toying with Expedia to find a round-trip flight that would have us flying out of and back into Seattle, with a bender and a VH show in between, within 24ish hours. We had a few of these worked out, the west coast shows were definitely easier to accommodate.

Add the price of the event to the mix, though, and there's a really good chance I wouldn't be able to do this more than once. Floor seats, really the only seats worth buying, are $150 (not including tax & fees). The airplane would be anywhere from $100 to $400. Add another $200 in sundries (car rental, beer, food, hotel) and we're up to almost $700 a person for the outing. Again, I don't think I'd do this more than once.

It's all water under the bridge, though. The shows themselves run far higher than the amount I'd be willing to pay for any other act on the green earth. There's a show in Seattle, which will sadly be a non-highlight, yet to be scheduled, and another show in Portland for 12/1/07. We're thinking about making a "Graham's First Travel Adventure" out of the Portland experience, more on that later.

Meet my new friend Big Shirley

She's here! Welcome the latest addition to the Seattle Roche crew: Big Shirley.





Last weekend, Elissa was out of town and I was home totally by myself for probably the first time since I got Maxine in 2000. I went from shelter to shelter looking for a good sized, nice, young dog, and happened upon Big Shirley up in Everett. I immediately fell in love. Who wouldn't? No one wouldn't, in fact, which is why I had to wait until Thursday and then enter a drawing (it was only me and one other lady) to get her. The cops up there pulled her out of a car on a hot day and no one claimed her, so she's all ours now.

After grabbing her from the vet this morning (spay & deformed 5th claw removed), we took her around town and for a trip around the lake. She's surprisingly well-behaved. A lot of energy, but someone taught her what to do when the humans mean business. She sits when asked, and always throws a high-five once she's on her ass. Now she just runs laps around our dining room table and acts nice.

We're taking her camping next week where she'll learn more of the ropes. I think she's going to be great. She's docile as heck, no aggression toward dogs and no fear of people. Good choice. Thanks!

Well damn it.

So today, Maxine got put down.

She was living high on the hog since her diagnosis. I bet she consumed more calories in a day that most of my friends in the same timeframe. We pulled out all the stops. One day, Eazy's work bought a 'sack' of Egg McMuffins for a class on not spitting on children, and she came home with like 6 of them. Pardon me, they were Sausage McMuffins (the cousin). Every day for a week, I'd tear up one and throw its pieces on the back patio for M to find and eat. Add to that about a hundred pounds a week of restaurant leftovers and you can just see her teasing other dogs at the park about how their lives suck it.

Yesterday, Melissa came home from work and Maxine didn't come into the house for her usual obnoxious greeting, nor did she get all wiggly for her walk around the lake. Elissa called me in tears, so I rushed home to find M keeping the weight off her tumor-side leg and not able to run more than a few steps before returning to a subtle limp. We made an appointment for the vet, fake-hoping that there's something they could do.

This morning, I tried feeding her half a sausage and she couldn't slink through the dog door because of the weakness in her leg. I knew she wouldn't make it to the end of the day, and Eazy had plans to head out of town for a family funeral. So I didn't say anything to Elissa, and, after getting off work early, found M in the same sad state.

Anyway, to cut to the chase, we brought M in at 3:30. We waited for a while for the doc. Maxine's whole thorax was full of fluid, and her x-ray from the last visit is a legend at the office. Her heart was beating visibly, on the opposite side of her body from where it belonged because of the size of the tumor. They gave her a sedative and I ran through her favorite routines ('pick which hand has the treat', "Where's Donnie Chubb?", the high five, "Gertie Gertie Gertie", and some others) as it set in, to keep her tail-stump wiggling. Then the vet came back in and, having no luck on veins in both her back legs, shot some poison into her front leg and she was dead, right in front of us with her last high-five still in my hand, in about another 90 seconds.

It was sad as hell, I have a derivative of diaper rash around my eyes and nose from crying so much. At the end, I said something like "Now we have a dead dog, this sucks. Let's split.", and me and Melissa headed home in silence. I folded my clean laundry and we started joking about how I'm going to get a bloodhound while Elissa is out with her family. We talked later about how we both independently secretly thought it would have been fun to have pictures of Maxine and Killer Graham before she kicked it, but that won't happen. My little black bird is just a funny story now.

Long Live the M. If you're bored and have some time to kill, read this.

Burning Down the House

The house construction is on hold. Really long story...

We fixed up the old house and put it on the market using Redfin, the new whizbang discount real estate agency. Saving the litany of complaints for those truly interested, suffice it to say that those people couldn't sell air conditioners to Arizona. The house sat and sat with no attention (at least none that I heard about).

A month into it, 3 weeks ago Monday, we went with our friend Diane to take over the listing. She's great. We got immediate attention, but the vacant lot next door has scared off multiple potential buyers. As much assurance, colloquial and legal, as I can promise, it's still a risky proposition. We have to wait for 'the right buyer' and we'll be rolling around in money.

No we won't. Reality set in and we're not going to be able to pay off the lot with our profit on the house. Truth be told, the $40k I put into repairs earned me nothing. At the current price, we'll still owe something like $75k on the lot, and anything else people require of the price just adds to our debt.

That said, it's important to note that our architect-built house is now very far from our reach. The custom build process would push us way out of our budget, potentially into a worse spot than the one that forced us to consider the process in the first place.

Our decision now is heavily in the court of Timberland Homes. They build modular homes, where they take your order (marginally customizing their existing floor plans) and build the house on their own lot. When the house is 75% done, they cut it up, load it on trailers, and drop it on your foundation with a crane. Despite the yawn prompted by their literature, they actually do some pretty cool work. Additionally, they're extremely flexible with their floorplans. The examples they have can be reconfigured to face our view, and there are tons of options that will cost/save money at every decision. We're excited, the difference in cost between this and the custom design is about $200k.

Stay tuned on this. It all seems too good to be true, and we're not going to press with the Timberland people until we have an offer in the financing stage for the old house. There's still a possibility that I scrap the whole deal and sell the house + the lot to some developer and we move into a nice house somewhere else.

Baby Health is a Go!

Everything is going great with the baby. Knock wood for us, but we seem to be having the template experience with this pregnancy. Not to take credit for anything, Elissa is a heck of a gal. She's getting uncomfortable and self-conscious, but she's walking the 3-mile Green Lake loop every day and she looks great.

Last night we went to a baby class to learn about emergency pre-term labor and all the early gross stuff. When they talked about the water breaking, they asked us to remember a mnemonic to help with what we tell the doctor. You're supposed to remember the time, amount, color, and odor of any liquid that comes out. I should have been dry-heaving at the thought of a variably-odorous liquid spilling from my wife's up-there, but I was just hungry for tacos. Mmmm, I love a good taco.

Big Bad David Lee is Sweet Graham Lucas now

After months of failing to agree on names for David Lee, Elissa and I agreed on the name "Graham Lucas Roche". His nickname will be 'Killer' (Killer Graham Roche), and we're pleased as punch.

Our process was kind of novel. We fought and fought over names that were too close to famous flamboyant lead singers (mine) and dogs (Elissa), and finally decided to bury the hatchet. One night when Elissa was out at her book club, I told her I was going to parse through the baby name books and write down every name I liked. When she got back, she did the same thing, but without looking at my names. After we both settled on our own short lists, we traded papers and came to a shorter list of possibilities. Add to that Elissa's exposure to the obscure/trendy names of the 2000's, and we came up with the name Graham Lucas Roche.

I didn't bust out the 'Killer Graham' bit until after Elissa told people, because she hates when I have fun. I win again.

Maxine is what you call a trooper

The lump on her side is now a full-fledged fist, but she's not showing any signs of pain or sluggishness. We had our first really hot week this week, so she's as panty as any other dog in town, but as far as her carrying 6 lbs. of cancer? No sign of anything degrading.

This has us pretty happy. I always envisioned Maxine and David Lee Roche laying together on the couch, and I just might get my wish. Fingers crossed.

It's still sad to do stuff with Maxine. We climbed up a mountain when we were on the coast for the 4th, and, like I said, she showed no signs of disease. Still, every time we take her somewhere we know it could be the last time. For now, though, she's still a buster.

Flood of Updates

Above you'll see a flood of updates on our favorite three topics: the house, the dog, and the baby. Sorry for the vacuum of posts, it's only recently come to my attention that more than one person reads this besides me ;).

Maxine: Bad, but not as bad as it could be I guess

I got 'the call' from the vet. Maxine's fucked. The lump on the outside of her ribs, which is the size of 2 rolls of dimes or so, is only 10% the size of the bulk inside her rib cage. It would cost a lot to find the academic cause of the cancer, but it's more than likely a tumor related to her blood vessels, since other cancers rarely bleed at all, and hers is.

This fucking sucks. My little scared buddy is going to die soon. I got her when she was really little, and brought her to work every day for 5 years where she laid under my desk and barked at my co-workers. Now she's helpless, after a lifetime of being scared of her own shadow.

Maxine's Sick

Real sick. We think it's cancer.

I felt a lump on her side, behind her left front leg, a couple weeks ago when she was laying on her right side. Then, after we got back from Charlie's wedding, she was puking more than normal. The two sets of symptoms are likely unrelated, but they prompted us to make a trip to the vet. We took her this morning.

The vet was immediately concerned. First he checked her out and noticed that the lump has a heartbeat, and that the lump was stuck to her rib cage. No-worry lumps are typically stuck to a dog's skin or floating somewhere in the fat layer, I've since read. Then he took a prick of the lump and noticed under a microscope that the cells he isolated had 2 nuclei, meaning that they're dividing in front of his face. Cancer!

He kept her to put her under anesthesia and get some x-rays. When he reported back, the x-rays showed that the lump is swelling on both sides of M's rib cage, right alongside her heart. Luck be a lady, the transient animal cardiologist was scheduled to make an appointment to their office today, so they kept her to get an ultrasound and a diagnosis from an expert. We're waiting on that report.

She's gonna die. Even if it's the kind of thing where Maxine can stay doped up forever, she's not going to live much longer without pointless surgery. I've prepared for this ever since I fell in love with her, but I thought we'd have a baby to worry about before my little M started showing her age. Not so.

Elissa is all torn up, and I can't talk about it without getting misty. I'll update this post if we hear news today.

Baby Boy Roche is a winner

We went to a doctor's appointment yesterday, and everything is honky donkey with David Lee. No problemos, he's actually running on the big side and Elissa is cold rockin' it. Heartbeat, check. Dancing machine, check.

Meet my new friend Andre

This is Andre.

click any of these pictures to enlarge
We saw him at a bar after my brother Charlie's wedding last week in Somers Point, NJ. He was there by himself, looking good as hell. After doing a pass for the ladies, he put his hair in a pony tail and got down to some serious dancing. I tried to take a couple James Bond photos, but he's like an eel out there. What I did manage to catch is documentation that I wasn't the only Andre fan in the place. If you look around him, everyone was like "Who is that magic little man?".



After twice capturing only passing glances of his splendor, I just tapped him on the shoulder, showed him my camera, and said "Can you take your hair out of the pony tail? I'm going to take a million pictures of you.". He did. I did.



After making love to my camera lens, we set him loose after a quick teaser to get into the video portion of tonight's presentation. If these videos are too dark for your monitor, you can check them out as AVI files from here:



Now, it's Andre. First, he hams it up with a couple hotties. Then they walk away disgusted, and he again makes it happen for my pregnant wife and her tiny camera.



And finally, his swan song. After this, his pink limousine showed up and took him to the excellent future where everyone in the world has this hair cut. He's on in this one. If you listen closely, you can hear me yell "You're a dirty dog, man."

It's a David Lee!

We found out the gender today! It's a boy, it turns out. More important, but not yet official, the ultrasound guy noted that all fingers/toes/brains/organs/arteries/etc. are right where they belong. There's a movie I'll post tomorrow from my Mac, but here's a slideshow with the stills from the 3D ultrasound (scroll to the bottom left of the little embedded window to see the good stuff):

View photos here if slideshow doesn't load or takes too long.

Architect Contract

The new architect sent the boilerplate AIA (American Institute of Architects) contract for our house. I'm torn. It's very vague, and the only literature, despite Google searches using terms like "warning" and "problem", seems to focus on only the hellish scenarios. I'm going to give it an amateur read and see if there's something someone in internet-land had issues with.

In the meantime, we're plugging away on the old house and the new. My job just changed, and we have a vacation to my brother Charlie's wedding next week, so we're still in "never a dull moment" territory.

Old House Almost Done!

Last weekend signaled the end of most of the work on the old house. The interior and exterior painters jumped into high gear to finish ASAP once we cleared out of the house. Both paint jobs look great, despite setbacks. The funny end to the exterior paint job came via the Mexican crew chief.

He asked me if I wanted to pay taxes. It took a couple times to make sure he was asking what he was asking, and then once more to make sure he was serious. When I finally settled up, he told me I owed one price without taxes, or $350 less if I didn't want to pay taxes. His justification was "We won't tell the government either way". I won't say what we paid, but it was a funny exchange.

We're all moved

Well, mostly moved. 99.9% of our belongings are now in the new rental apartment. All that's left is our desktop computer and some odds/ends. It took 10 hours, $1000, and all the sanity the two of us had. I loathe moving, but we were well-prepared and I'm glad it didn't drag out into a multi-day event.

It's a nice place, plenty of room and plenty of storage. We're going to need to work on getting rid of a lot of what we have as storage. Before moving, it was spread around the basement and clustered in the garage, and now we have filled all permissible space, in all 3 dimensions, of the garage we get as part of our rent. Some stuff is easy to see say bye, other stuff will be harder to part with. What I don't want to do is clutter up the inside, because we'll just be moving again in a year or two and the same nonsense will apply.

Shocking, especially if you've been following my progress with giving stuff away, was how much more we have now than what we moved in with. It's unreal. The move from the CD to Phinney was barely one truck-ful, but this took two trips, and the 2nd trip filled the truck almost half-way. I'm glad we didn't pay by the pound.

The best thing about our new place is its proximity to Green Lake. We're right behind the part where there's a playground and the baseball fields, so it'll be fun to sneak beers down there on weeknights and watch some grown-folk play softball. It's also decent for the dog, since the trail is a little bit of a walk. We can either let her run & sniff or take the trail around the lake. I'm pleased!

Craigslist.org Freebie Dump Run

We're packing to move out of the house this weekend, and I've bilged up so much operational but otherwise useless junk, I had to get rid of some stuff. We live pretty close to a Goodwill, which takes garbage in the name of donations, but I tried posting some stuff to Craigslist's free-stuff site to save myself a trip.

Here's what I was giving away:

• 2 Table Saws - they're both broken, in different ways, and they're different brands, so even a table saw manufacturer would have a hard time Frankensteining one saw out of the pair.
• Helium Tank & Balloons - we bought this to test a balloon backdrop for our wedding, but then common sense took over.
• Lamp - this is an absurd piece, no joke. It is one of those multi-headed jobs where each bulb is on a flexible cable, but it's ugly as death. The shades on each of the bulbs had a purple hazy fabric crunched around it. I bought it thinking it would provide great light in the basement if I took the shades off, but I never took it out of the box. This cost me $15 from a co-worker.
• Stereo - Not a bad deal, but you could get one of these shelf models for $80, and you'd have a guarantee. Mine was old, ugly, and I couldn't remember whether or not it worked and didn't take the time to check.
• Fat Suit - If you're a fan of my Halloween costumes, you know I specialize in the 'fat guy'. Whether he's Rerun or the Skipper from Gilligan's Island, he had a huge butt and deep creases. I'm getting a little tired of the fat guy, so I gave away the understructure for the suit.
  

The responses came in an insane barrage. No exaggeration, I posted the ad at 9PM on a Monday night and received 200 responses before midnight. Some highlights:

Long Distance Packrats
Nothing I was offering cost me more than $50. Still, with gas as expensive as it is today, there are people who offered to travel incredible distances for my garbage. Assuming the price per mile of 25 cents, here's how each of the items topped out in terms of what people were willing to pay:

• Saws: Kent, WA / 25.3 mi (one way) / 1hr 12min round trip / $12.65 (not bad!)
  
• Balloon Tank: McChord AFB / 46.9 mi (one way) / 2 hr 6 min round trip / $23.45
• Lamp: Anacortes, WA / 78.1 mi (one way) / 3 hr 8 min round trip / $39.05
• Stereo: South Tacoma, WA / 41.4 mi (one way) / 110 min round trip / $20.90
• Fat Suit: No one really wanted this
  

Sad Stories
Some people can't catch a break, even with free stuff:

• Stereo: "My stepdaughter's biological dad promised her a stereo for christmas and once again left her hanging, so it would be awesome to surprise her with this. (she's 10)."
• Stereo: "Well today is my birthday.... and my last stero was stolen... I was saving up for a new one.... but free is always a good present... " (his '...').
• Lamp + Stereo: "I am in need of both if you still have them, due to my ex-landlord giving all my stuff to Goodwill without my permission or even letting me know he was about to. "
  

The Multi-Responders
For some reason, the notion of a freebie that you would throw away yourself is enough to have a person up all night obsessing. The best of these by a landslide is a lady named "Tish". Persistence paid off for her, actually. The guy who claimed the lamp didn't show, so I left the lamp and the fat suit in my driveway from her and she grabbed it while me and Eazy were out having dinner.

• "You have some bizarre but freakin funny stuff. I saw the 'fat guy' suit. My husband has a 'puke man' suit that's always a lot of fun. Anyway, I'm hoping to come get your lamp Tuesday eve (7-ish) and it'd be fab to grab the saws while I'm at it. We live on a boat so the size is perfect."
• "It's me, Tish, again. Tell ya what. How about we just take it ALL off your hands for you at the same time?"
• "You'll find I've responded to several of your postings and suggested that we just come take it all off your hands at 7:00 this eve. If you still have it available just give me a call and we're there in our little van to help you clear out your basement in one shot. This is serious!"
• "How do we get these things? You have several things posted that we'd LOVE to get! I mean one can never have TOO many Halloween costumes, right? I responded last night and told you we'll just come take it ALL off your hands in one quick swoop."
• "Hey, it's me ... Tish, again. It's almost 7:00 and I don't know where to find you. But I'm sitting here at the ready. Shoes on and just waiting for your call. In case you're not sure (and I don't understand that at all!) I'm the one that's been stalking your postings."

She came to get the stuff, so we never met.

Summary
I have nothing to complain about. The eventual recipients of the items came and went without any drama. The whole affair took 15 minutes, if it even took that long. Thanks, craigslist!

Long Time No Me!

Some ketchup:

1. Talked to architect & contractor, no decision yet
   
2. Signed lease on rental house, moving before May 1
3. Elissa and David Lee are healthy and happy
4. Financial relief courtesy of IRS
   

We talked to both an architect and a contractor to try and solidify our decision on whether to een use an independent architect. The answer: We don't know yet.

The basic decision boils back to the notion of the friendly animosity the architect would have with the contractor. Long story short, the architect will have a strong impression on what the eventual product should look like, and will work for us to make sure it happens. Not to say a contractor wouldn't, but there aren't a lot of contractors out there with experience building modern houses. That said, any of the contractors we contacted would monopolize the design/build decisions, and we'd run the risk of advocating for ourselves to get our final product completed to our expectations. We still have some time, because we can't really afford to pay anyone until the current house sells.

Number two. We signed a lease on an expensive, but awesome, rental. It's close to $1800/month, but we won't have to rent separate storage ($300/mo). I'm happy. It's less than 2 blocks from Green Lake, and they love dogs. We are in like Fred Gwynne with the landlords, and our deposit is already paid. Our 'move-in' date is April 15, but we're going to take our sweet time moving while the home-stretch renovations are getting done.

Number three. We went for another doctor's appointment yesterday and everything is honky donkey. The baby's heartbeat is like a chainsaw, and Eazy's doctor relieved a lot of my concerns with a potential genetic concern (Down's syndrome doesn't pass genetically, except in the rarest of cases). It'll be after my brother Charlie's wedding until we have an appointment that moves expectations beyond the "everything's OK" mode, but the lack of news is good news unto itself.

Number four. Good news and bad news.

Bad news: Out of almost $50k (fifty thousand dollars, whaaat?!?) in mortgage interest & taxes in 2006. Of that huge number, only $2200 went toward the principal of the loan. The rest was pissed into the bank's pot. Can you believe that?

Good news: Uncle Sam pretends like that $50k is money I never made, so I get back the tax money withheld from my paycheck. Unless they figure out I counted a deduction twice or something, I have $10k coming back to me in cold, dirty cash.

Not good news: The lack of the interest payments for the balance of 2007 will make all the money I make taxable. I'll need to remember to funk with my payroll department to withhold enough so I won't get a rude awakening next April.

That's it. Upcoming events are largely uneventful. We'll be moved by the end of the month and there will be more little kid stuff to report. 5 g's.

New Architect Hunt

The search for a new architect started last night. First things first, we really need to think about the product of an architect and evaluate whether that's something we want to work into the budget.

An architect is really more of a concept aggregator. The usual process requires the sponsor of the project to do little more than loosely guide the architect's direction, and then respond to the proposals with appreciation or redirection. That was the rub with our quitters (see last post). They wanted to be more of a design lead, where we wanted to really guide the design in a hands-on fashion.

The alternative is to work with a design-build company, or to go straight to a construction company and work with their designers. Basically, it's the same workflow, but they vary based on whether the designer or the contractor own the company. This is good because it saves money for people coming in with plans, but it doesn't work as well if your ideas aren't 100% fleshed out.

So last night we talked to an architecture firm that morphed from a design-build shop to a straight-up architecture firm. They are definitely good, they have a good sense of taste and seem to enjoy getting as much input from the customer as possible. We need them. While we have the room divisions and outer structure all conceptualized, the physical space and the interior fixtures aren't my bag. The alternative option to hire a design-builder or a contractor with a design sub-contractor won't work for this. They'd be basically designing what they intend to build, which doesn't provide for us the strength of having an advocate for our design ride out the construction process.

We have an appointment Friday to meet with such a contractor, who comes with strong references from a co-worker, and we'll see whether we want to work with them, and in what capacity. Right now, I'm leaning toward sailing with this 2nd architecture firm, and finding a contractor with an understanding of the more modern construction techniques. More on Friday after our meeting...

First Casualty - Our Architect Quits

You heard it right. The architect quit today. I suppose I'm not dismayed by the news, but I am very surprised. If you're following our plight, you probably noticed that I didn't mention the name of the firm, and I'll stay true to that unless I'm contacted to provide a reference. Regardless, the news was very surprising. This already -expensive process turned out to be a mix of silver linings. With the $5000 we spent, we had the opportunity to flesh out our ideas, and learned a lot more about the process than any class we'd take.

One thing is for sure, if you're reading this for advice on a project: Don't sign anything that locks you into any multi-phased effort until you're over 90% sure that you won't regret your decision later. This architect was actually prescient enough to present a separate 'schematic phase' contract with a full project contract as a rider. I, accidentally brillantly, only signed on for the schematic phase and I'm totally glad I was such a genius when I didn't really know what I was doing.

That said, here's his feedback, followed by my interpretation:

You have very strong design ideas, and many of these are reflected in the design to date. However, as the design develops, per your direction, it has become clear that you are more comfortable generating design solutions, rather than giving us feedback on what the goals and problems are. You may be better served by designing the home yourself, and working with a drafting service or design-build firm

True. The process started with my drawings of the exterior. The first iteration commensed with me submitting layouts of the entire interior. The last iteration ended with me resubmitting the drawings of the exterior (see prior post). I'm definitely going to take his advice and address my needs with a d/b firm.

We took this project on as a challenge, to design a modern home that did not have to be expensive. We have attempted to design to your stated budget, which has consistently left you dissatisfied. We are in the difficult position of having to choose between following your design direction or meeting your budget.

Whatever. When I addressed budget issues with them, they waffled consistently. I offered to make MAJOR shortcuts on luxuries like a master bed/bath to keep this under cost. This firm's creative guidance assigns cost to appearance, rather than innovation or practicality. The 'challenge' that they took on was met by designing the simplest, barebones, least innovative idea available: a drab, featureless box.

As we both know, communication has been difficult for a number of reasons on this project. The stakes are relatively low at this point, but as the project moves into permit and construction drawings, and ultimately construction, communication and a positive working relationship are critical. I am not optimistic that this will happen.

Their communication was neither preemptive or reactionary. They let the drawings do the talking, and failed to respond to my requests to update their drawings when I spoke my language (words) or their language (drawings). When they failed to meet our expectations on things like a back door or, well, a back door, I made suggestions and carefully communicated my dissatisfaction with the negative progress. They failed to respond, and they continued to make changes to the plans that totally violated our requests, which were submitted in spirit, in precise wording, and in inarguable drawings.

Finally, your e mail regarding a face to face meeting on “fiduciary” issues raised a flag. Excuse me if I am making incorrect assumptions about the purpose of the meeting. I will readily admit that a portion of the hours spent by our office to date have led in tangential directions. However, we have consistently tried to respond to your stated goals. The design to date reflects this. 65 hours have been billed to date. In reality, 118 hours have been spent through March 7, 2007. I did not bill actual hours to account for the detours. You would not ever be billed for the difference. To date, we have received $670.00 in compensation. There is a portion left on the contract, (which is hourly to a maximum), that we do not plan to bill. This is a very favorable situation for you.

If they devoted 118 hours to this, my name is Nell Carter. There is no way in god's green earth that they spent almost 3 person-weeks on this, unless they're drawing with their feet. To be honest, I was calling that meeting to have them justify their billing for the 65 hours. With this, I think I'd bite off more than I could chew because they'd run their bills up to the limit, which is another $2000 on top their already high fees.

Truth be told, Eazy and I were already discussing the best way to make a clean break from these guys. There's another paragraph in his email that enables us to make a clean break and still own the schematics, so that's huge for us. I still owe them about $4000, which we don't really have to spare, but I'll find the money somewhere. Long story short, this voluntary break plays right into our hands. It's a surprise, but it's more like finding a dollar in your pocket than it is getting crapped on by a bird.

I replied to them to say that the bills will definitely be paid. We pounded out a schedule with them that had us filing for a permit by this time, having started the schematics in mid-December, and filing the permit before the end of April. That would have set us up with the artifacts necessary to start a construction loan application, and the financials would have flowed smoothly from my bank account to the loan.

New External Elevations Drawings

Z z z z...

These are, at least I hope these are, first drafts. I almost fell asleep looking at them. We're really pulling for a structure that's inspiring and museum-quality, but these drawings are just a dirty box. Take an extra second to notice the color scheme. No offense to the architect, but they look like a standard Pacific Northwest pallette. You don't really see these colors together since the end of the 1990's. They kind of remind me of an outdoorsy guy's clothes. Fleece vest, jeans, and those suede laceless sneakers.

I replied to him with our impression of what we want. It's basically a re-draw of a very early 3D sketch I did to get my thoughts on paper. The main thing is an unbroken line that frames the building and provides an overhang for each run of windows. My drawings are a really rough idea of what I'd like to see, so I'm eager to hear back from him.

First, the elevation drawings I received. Below those are my submissions back to him.

OK Baby!

Elissa went to the doctor's today. We heard the heartbeat, and the nurse practitioner told us that once you hear it, you're pretty much locked in with a much lower chance of "things like a miscarriage". Great news! David Lee's heartbeat is almost exactly twice as fast as Elissa's, which is great.

Another appointment in 4 weeks or something? Eazy is pushing for designer maternity jeans, which I find hilarious. We'll see if she shuns our frugality agreement to get them, I'm going to let her do what she wants.

Updated 3rd floor plans

The bulk of the work was done to streamline the bathroom and add a linen closet. We had goals before of leaving a sink-only room available to both bedrooms with a tub/toilet room walled off and behind a door. After the first round of drawings, the toilet seemed too cramped and I hate having to clean behind toilets in tight rooms. My last house had a little alcove where the toilet was, and my meaty hands couldn't get back there. Anyway, it looks really good.

Additional to that is a plan for stabilizing the price. The architect is suggesting that we nail down the schematics and start scouting for contractors. Also, we have a weird height restriction on the lot which, before we bought it, was meant to protect a future builder from encroaching on our view. Now that we're the encroacher and the encroachee, we're going to file papers with the city to rescind that document.

Here's the new 3rd floor. Note also that the master bedroom is a little smaller to accommodate the sink, but that's fine with me.

Feedback on yesterday's 2nd round of plans

I followed up via email with the architect to give positive feedback on the progress in the latest set of designs. Here's a quote:

Much better. Elissa likes the changes, too. Just like before, the first floor is a lock. The 2nd floor is solid too, unless there's a need to change things to accommodate moving stuff off the 3rd floor.

Some changes for the 3rd floor. They're hard to explain, so just imagine making all these changes in sequence, most of them are for the bathroom:

1) Remove the wall/door separating the toilet from the rest of the room. This made sense before, but now it's not really a concern for us.

2) Turn the toilet 90 degrees, facing out, and push it closer to the tub.

3) Remove the toilet-side sink, and use that wall as a door leading into a linen closet that's cut out of 1/2 the non-master-bedroom closet.

4) Move the wall to the north side of the other sink about 3 feet, and put the 2nd sink next to it.

5) Change the way the door between the master bed & bath, so it opens out to the rest of the room.

That'll make the rooms a little less square, but we'll gain a linen closet, some standing space, and a side-by-side sink. If you think the change in #3 will make the non-master bedroom's closet too small, we can move the w/d to the 2nd floor and use that area as a linen closet.

In terms of starting an estimate for all this, is there anything you've done before to put a value to the features of the house this early in the process? Several of the contractors I spoke with said they'd be available to discuss design ideas prior to the construction, but, with the digging probably not starting for another 4-6 months, I'd be hesitant to start looping someone in unless it's more or less the norm. Let me know.

A couple obvious trade-offs include:

- Shed. We'd rather have a basement because it's impossible to retrofit a basement while it's a cinch to build a shed.

- 3rd floor. Until our kids are older, we can minimize the finishing on the whole 3rd floor and take care of that over time.

- I'd really hate to sacrifice the sunken living room, but that's an option. This really gives the house a unique character, though, so let's put this behind the 3rd floor finishings on the "cut list".

Thanks so much for responding to our requests in such a timely fashion. Things were trending away from our initial plans for the past month, so we got a little stressed, but I'm happy that we're back on track.

Truth be told, Elissa isn't really jazzed about the idea of delaying the finishing of the 3rd floor until after we move in. Realistically, though, it'll just be us and an infant for the immediate move-in timeframe. The cost of including those finishings in the construction cost will be the barebones cost + the general contractor's multiplier, so we'll wind up spending less and pacing it more adequately if we wait. I'm actually not really looking forward to the delay either, but if it cuts the price of the construction to fit our budget, I'm willing to make that sacrifice.

Updated plans - back on track!

After a couple frustrating iterations and a succinct phone call, the plans are back on track to where they were 4 weeks ago. We have only small details left to define, so I'm happy we're close to the end. We got back our view-facing lounge, the big closet in the master bedroom, and the first floor was left alone.

The phone call basically covered just my preference to answer interim questions, rather than play tennis with the drawings. The latter method is very resource-consuming (time-consuming, but I'm paying $100/hr for their time), and I'm in front of a computer all day anyhow. Another scarier concern that surfaced in the phone call was the architect's ignorance to the financial ramifications of the changes that are being made. I'm hoping to get to a point where we can trade off features, like having a shed vs basement or installing metal siding vs wood siding, but the architect admitted his inability to drill down to the costs of various options. Chances are we'll have to loop in a contractor sooner than later to get through this very early phase.

Here are the drawings that came today:

Another iteration of plans

Some progress, but also some more ambivalence to our major design goals. In this run of drawings, we see the floor plan expanding 8 feet on the longer axis to accommodate the back door and some space for a pantry and some storage. We also see a 180 degree rotation of the 2nd floor, which ignores our major goal of positioning the 'lounge' in the northwest corner of the house to take advantage of the view and punching the ceiling through to the 3rd floor. Also, the third floor loses its cool entry to the shared sink area of the bathroom and surrenders a significant amount of closet space to the newly-expanded 2nd bedroom.

My feedback is to put a lock on the 1st floor. Everything can be assumed as approved until we start nitpicking the final design. The data above was given to the architect, but we're going to talk on the phone this afternoon rather than trade emails. My main message is that I'd rather talk than trade drawings, and I'll make myself available for approval on any change to the drawings.

Here are the three floors, click to see a bigger pic:

Just got some new plans

After two meetings with the architects, we're still in discussion about the features and layout of the house. They sent some pdf's today (along with an email that the deputy architect is going to be gone until Thursday, so she won't respond to my feedback until this time next week, whaaaaat!!!!!) and we have some constructive feedback.

Here are the plans. Our suggestions include some representation of a "men's room" kind of basement space, a back door, shelves built into the walls of the dining room, and the embodiment of the concept of a sunken living room without the dining room being set so low. Also, I'm not a fan of the compressed kitchen. With all that space, I don't want it to feel like a cabin or a vacation house.

Below are some links to low-res images, and a link to the master PDF below. Don't spend a ton of time analyzing these docs, because our house will be decidedly different. In the future, it might be neat looking at the evolution of the plans, but these miss our stated mark and I'm temporarily frustrated a bit with the process. The elevation (external) representation of these is missing, so there's not a lot of context right now.








PLANS - DRAFT 1

The chosen one

I know this is supposed to be about the new house, but in the "everything we have to deal with" category comes none other than the yet-to-be-born David Lee Roche. Behold!

He/she is something like 0.9 cm long, and 7 weeks along. We're still tentative on announcing this to the world (I haven't told anyone about the blog until I get some house plans to post), but we're really happy and a little scared.

Welcome!

Today's the day. It's Valentine's Day and we've bitten deep enough into the bullet to assume that this house thing is 100% go.

Some background:
We bought a wonderful house in 2004 at 129 NW 50th St, Seattle WA 98107. When we bought the house, the lot next door was still owned by the guy who sold us the house. The lot comes between us and the great view of the Olympics and Puget Sound. When the lot came up for sale about a year after we moved in, we jumped at the chance to buy it. We jumped so far and fast, in fact, we didn't take into account that it might be a financial commitment that would bite our butts down the line.

Less than a year later, we're changing our plans. We can't afford the mortgage on the house and the payments on the lot. It's more than my take-home salary every month, which is crazy. Our plan, then, is to build a house on the neighboring lot, at 131 NW 50th St.

So far, our plans consist of:

• fix up our current house
• sell our current house
• move into an apartment or house (rental)
• oversee the design and construction of the new house
• move in to the new house

And, so far we've:

• updated the furnace in the current house
• started on the new house designs
  

What's the big deal, you ask? Well, we have a baby on the way too. Needless to say, this is going to be quite an adventure. Look for much more from us in the coming 18 months. Me, Elissa, and little David Lee.